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Self-defense classes are important

Dear Heloise: Two years ago, a friend asked me to attend a self-defense class with her because she felt uncomfortable going alone. So, I agreed, and it was the smartest thing I’ve ever done. This past Christmas while I was out shopping one evening, I was busy placing packages in the trunk of my car. A man came up behind me, grabbed my hair, and said I’d better give him money or else. He had a small gun aimed at my neck. I said that I had no cash and usually shopped with my credit cards. I figured this would work to get rid of him. It didn’t. He took my car keys and told me to ...

Caught between parents

Dear Annie: My parents have been in a rocky marriage for as long as I can remember. I’m 16, and my brother is 20 and away at college. My dad has left and come back a few times, and now he’s telling my mom again that he’s done and wants her to move out. She’s heartbroken, and it’s really hard to watch. I’ve seen her cry more in the past few weeks than in my whole life. I don’t really know how to talk to my dad about it. He says he still loves us but doesn’t want to be with Mom anymore. I feel stuck in the middle. How am I supposed to handle this without picking sides or ...

Expel paint from spray-paint cans

Dear Heloise: I read your hint about how to unclog spray paint nozzles in the Plain Dealer. Years ago, I found an easy solution to prevent clogging. When you have finished using the spray paint, turn the can upside down so that the nozzle is on the bottom and the can is above. Then press the spray nozzle until the paint in the inside tube and nozzle is expelled. You will know when to stop because the paint will stop coming out and just pressurized air will come out of the nozzle. Since the paint is now expelled, there is little, if any, paint to dry out in the nozzle. I hope this helps ...

Reclaiming independence in marriage

Dear Annie: I’ve been married for 38 years, and over time I’ve realized that I’ve slowly lost a sense of who I am. My husband is a good man in many ways, but he’s always the one who decides where we go, what we do and who we spend time with. If something doesn’t interest him, it simply doesn’t happen. I’ve gone along with it for years, but lately I’ve started to feel invisible in my own life. We don’t have many friends, and I suspect it’s because he never wants to socialize unless it’s completely on his terms. I miss the feeling of being part of a community, of ...

Preparing donations properly

Dear Heloise: As so many are doing their spring cleaning, I’m sure they’re also preparing once-loved goods for donations. I’ve been volunteering for a small nonprofit that distributes clothing to families in need. We spend much time sorting through, throwing out and redonating the mountains of donated clothing. Please pass on these hints to help give donations a happy home and keep more stuff out of landfills: -- First off, thank you! It’s wonderful to donate rather than toss out these items. There are definitely people who can use your gently used clothing. -- Do a little ...

Bridging the gap in blended families

Dear Annie: I remarried a few years ago after losing my first wife, and my current wife also lost her husband. We both came into the marriage with grown children, and while blending two families always comes with challenges, most of the relationships have settled well -- except for one. My daughter seemed OK at first. She was polite and came around now and then. But for the past three years, she’s barely spoken to us. She only shows up at Christmas or for her kids’ birthday parties, and even then, she barely engages. My wife and I are often ignored, and it’s especially hard on ...